Whatever your beliefs, we should be in agreement that this is a huge problem and that there are unborn generations that we will never meet because of this painful reality. Generations that may have held the cure to cancers or answers to great Talmudic questions.
There will never be one solution that will satisfy each and every gripe on this topic. What we can focus on as individuals is the work we all must do to bring us to where we need to be.
In any disagreement, pointing fingers at one another will never resolve the conflict. All we can do is point to ourselves, take ownership, and make ourselves more whole, happy, healthy, flexible, and open-minded to another’s perspective.
We need to look inside ourselves and see what we can grow, change, adapt and fix within us.
Yes, we need to be more open minded to ideas that were outside our comfort zone. Yes, we need to seek help from therapists and dating coaches to figure out what may be holding us back from finding that right one. We probably do need to go out with someone who is shorter, older, or less educated than we may have liked. As matchmakers and friends, we need to listen with more sensitivity and have more compassion with less judgment. As a community, we need to discuss with our singles what they feel would be most beneficial to them.
I don’t have all the answer, but what I do know is that if we get into the habit of pointing fingers at others for our struggles, if we play the victim, and don’t roll up our sleeves to do the hard work, we will never build.
Let’s do that hard work of taking ownership to become greater versions of ourselves so that we can build healthier dating experiences, marriages, and communities.
Leading by example in the shortest route to their longest relationship.